AzCADV Sponsors DVTM

Fix the Hurt wants to give a big "shout out" to the Az Coalition Against Domestic Violence for sponsoring another production of "Domestic Violence, The Musical?" on May 11, 2009. The house may not have been packed with bodies, but it was packed with enthusiasm and emotion. The reaction from those in attendance was incredible. One young name became very angry with the actions of the abuser and commented to his family that, "it wasn't about his losing control, but about using control." What an astute observation!

My little 3 1/2 year old granddaughter attended because I couldn't stay home and babysit her and her parents wanted to be there, she sat very quietly in my lap next to her mommy and hardly moved. Even she was rivetted. The next day we were watching some of the video clips which included the abuser and she said to me, "I don't like him, he was mean to your friend." (referring to the victim).

You would think if a 17 year old and a 3 1/2 year old could get it, then a society of adults could understand the dynamics of domestic abuse.

I was touched by the reaction of one woman who came with her friend on a "spur of the moment" invitation. Seeing DVTM opened her eyes and some dialogue that was imperative to her courage to get out before it was too late. She commented that every time she would think about the things he had done to her, she would hear, C-O-N-T-R-O-L. Hooray for her.

On http://www.fixthehurtpag.org/, you can hear one of the songs from the play - "Abuser's Tango." There is also a link to pre-order the CD that will be available soon and will include 10 songs from DVTM.

On Wednesday night, I received a page to go to a domestic violence scene. When I arrived at 11:30 pm, I found a young woman, whose face was cut, bloody and swollen. I sat with her while she completed her statement for the police. She was trembling, disoriented and had difficulty focusing on her task. Her boyfriend had been arrested and taken to jail and she was already stressing over what would happen when he got out. I took her to the hospital emergency room in my car. (I got pulled over twice in the same 2 hrs period for traffic violations - but that is a different blog).

After spending several hours with her, I pray that she will not go back. I tried to do and say all the right things, but you never know what is going on in the mind of a victim. If she goes back this time, there may not be another opportunity to get out.

This is why it is so important to have information, listen to the victim, help them understand they are not alone. I know it is frustrating when victims make the wrong choice, but that doesn't mean we quit trying. Perhaps a life will be saved because of something you said or did right.