I met Steve during a blogathon sponsored by Joanna Doane - who was an intern for FTH last year and just an awesome young woman whose heart is 6 ft tall, eventhough her body is about 4'9". She blogged for 24 hours, raising much needed funds for Fix the Hurt, and I joined in for several and met some amazing ppl. Steve is one of them. He called to interview me for a paper he was writing for college credit. This is it. I think he did a great job.
Fix the Hurt by Steve Culp
A growing problem in the United States is domestic violence. Domestic violence can be defined as a pattern or behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Many people are victims of domestic violence and many people are unaware. Who are the victims of domestic violence? “Domestic abuse victims are doctors and lawyers and movie actors. They may be beautiful and have wonderful educations. They have only a few things in common - their fear and shame and their futile hope for change. You know them. They are your neighbors. They are the people you see on your walk. They may be you. They may be your child.”
Linda King and her husband John are a married couple who are very aware of domestic violence and the most horrible outcome domestic violence can have. Linda King lost her daughter Lisa to domestic v
iolence. “She died from blunt force trauma to the head - six blows and cocaine intoxication by ingestion - administered orally,” Linda states, as her fingers press down the buttons on her keyboard as she is typing.
“Sam was the only one in the apartment with her.” Sam was Lisa's husband, whom she had been divorced from for 3 years. “She died sometime around midnight and he didn't report it until 2:00 pm the next day.” What kind of judgment was served for a crime like this? “He was charged with murder, but convicted of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and got 10 yrs. He gets out in November this year. He served all 10 yrs, no parole. He is in the Texas prison system.” Did Linda feel that the ten year sentence was an adequate judgment? “I was disappointed in the sentence, but it is what it is and I would rather be Lisa's mother than his. I fear he will do it again.” she says “This was not his first offense. He had an agg [aggravated] assault in FL [Florida] several yrs ago. He spent two years in prison. Lisa thought she could "save him" and she went down a bad path with him.” says Linda, now explaining that she is typing quickly and there may be a chance for grammatical errors.
This situation must be hard for anyone, especially parents who are already involved in trying to help spread the word of domestic violence. “After Lisa's death I knew how she would want her hair and make-up so I dressed her body for her funeral. I tried to cover the bruises on her eye and cheek along with the bruise and cut on her lip. I dressed her so that the long sleeves on her dress would cover up the bruises on her arms. Some say purple is the color of healing, but to me it is the color of pain. I tell everyone I speak to that if they are the victim of a hit or feel that they want to hit, purple is the color they will see. The internal bruises/emotional, bruise the heart and soul and often are harder to heal than the bruises on the outside.” These are some very strong words from such a strong woman.
What steps did Linda take to spread the word of domestic violence? “I started speaking mainly to high school groups in 1999, even before Lisa died, because I thought she was out of the relationship and in a good place. She and I both volunteered at a dv [domestic violence] shelter in El Paso.” And after the death of Lisa, Linda took even more steps “We moved to AZ in 2005 and I decided that in order to break into the dv community here that I should form a non-profit. I went back to El Paso and did the interview of the DA, police chief, officer and advocate to try to give myself some credibility for my work in AZ. “
The non-profit Linda speaks about is called “Fix the Hurt” which is a non-profit organization that helps inform others about domestic violence , the outcome, and also offers several types of help to victims of domestic violence. The corporation and the people who run it, along with the volunteers, run different types of fund-raising events to help them spread the word. They even go to schools and prisons to speak and do different performances to help spread the word.. “Our play, CONTROL.ASSAULT.DELETE, is a two person play (John & I), we play the roles of ourselves, Lisa and her abuser, the bailiff and judge. We don't hold anything back, Lisa's drug use, the fact that she slept with a drug dealer for Sam to get his drugs. But we don't want what we do to be a memorial to Lisa, it is about every Lisa, Julie, Mary and Joe.” The performances also include “DV the Musical?” and “I Have This Friend”. The performances are very strong and not easily forgotten, as explained by Linda. ”My little non profit is small, but we try to make a difference. Our productions are really good and we have never failed to have a standing ovation. The message is strong and it is not something that is forgotten soon.”
“Fix the Hurt” has performed for over 20,000 people worldwide and have raised $15,000+ for victim services. Their website http://www.helpfixthehurt.org/ has listed many sources of information on domestic violence, victims, family, who can be a victim of domestic violence and offers a place and people for victims of domestic violence to turn to.
Domestic violence effects many people in many ways, be it the victim themselves or their families. Linda King was a victim herself, in her first marriage that had lasted nine years. “My first husband was abusive emotionally, but I never knew what it was. We were married for 9 years. We married very young.” Linda offers words of encouragement to victims of domestic violence. “You are a good person and deserve to be treated with respect. I will be here to listen and have information for you when you are ready. I won't judge you and I will believe you. I won't push you, but I will help you.” She even offers advice for people trying to help a person who is in a domestic violence relationship. “If you talk about their abuser, they will defend him. You have to keep the focus on them and what their dreams are and how to achieve those dreams. Can they achieve what they want if they stay where they are?” Those are very strong words of encouragement and advice from a very courageous woman.
There is much hope and passion in what Linda does, and there are many people who need to be informed of “Fix the Hurt” and their cause. “Fix the Hurts” website, its five directors and its list of volunteers, all help make it possible to help spread the word of domestic violence, what the outcome can be, how to deal with domestic violence, and how to spot a person who may be a victim of domestic violence. The people of “Fix the Hurt” are all very passionate about spreading the word and finding a stop to domestic violence. They are the heart and souls of “Fix the Hurt” and they are the courage, support, and strength for the victims of domestic violence.
Fix the Hurt by Steve Culp
A growing problem in the United States is domestic violence. Domestic violence can be defined as a pattern or behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Many people are victims of domestic violence and many people are unaware. Who are the victims of domestic violence? “Domestic abuse victims are doctors and lawyers and movie actors. They may be beautiful and have wonderful educations. They have only a few things in common - their fear and shame and their futile hope for change. You know them. They are your neighbors. They are the people you see on your walk. They may be you. They may be your child.”
Linda King and her husband John are a married couple who are very aware of domestic violence and the most horrible outcome domestic violence can have. Linda King lost her daughter Lisa to domestic v
iolence. “She died from blunt force trauma to the head - six blows and cocaine intoxication by ingestion - administered orally,” Linda states, as her fingers press down the buttons on her keyboard as she is typing.“Sam was the only one in the apartment with her.” Sam was Lisa's husband, whom she had been divorced from for 3 years. “She died sometime around midnight and he didn't report it until 2:00 pm the next day.” What kind of judgment was served for a crime like this? “He was charged with murder, but convicted of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and got 10 yrs. He gets out in November this year. He served all 10 yrs, no parole. He is in the Texas prison system.” Did Linda feel that the ten year sentence was an adequate judgment? “I was disappointed in the sentence, but it is what it is and I would rather be Lisa's mother than his. I fear he will do it again.” she says “This was not his first offense. He had an agg [aggravated] assault in FL [Florida] several yrs ago. He spent two years in prison. Lisa thought she could "save him" and she went down a bad path with him.” says Linda, now explaining that she is typing quickly and there may be a chance for grammatical errors.
This situation must be hard for anyone, especially parents who are already involved in trying to help spread the word of domestic violence. “After Lisa's death I knew how she would want her hair and make-up so I dressed her body for her funeral. I tried to cover the bruises on her eye and cheek along with the bruise and cut on her lip. I dressed her so that the long sleeves on her dress would cover up the bruises on her arms. Some say purple is the color of healing, but to me it is the color of pain. I tell everyone I speak to that if they are the victim of a hit or feel that they want to hit, purple is the color they will see. The internal bruises/emotional, bruise the heart and soul and often are harder to heal than the bruises on the outside.” These are some very strong words from such a strong woman.
What steps did Linda take to spread the word of domestic violence? “I started speaking mainly to high school groups in 1999, even before Lisa died, because I thought she was out of the relationship and in a good place. She and I both volunteered at a dv [domestic violence] shelter in El Paso.” And after the death of Lisa, Linda took even more steps “We moved to AZ in 2005 and I decided that in order to break into the dv community here that I should form a non-profit. I went back to El Paso and did the interview of the DA, police chief, officer and advocate to try to give myself some credibility for my work in AZ. “
The non-profit Linda speaks about is called “Fix the Hurt” which is a non-profit organization that helps inform others about domestic violence , the outcome, and also offers several types of help to victims of domestic violence. The corporation and the people who run it, along with the volunteers, run different types of fund-raising events to help them spread the word. They even go to schools and prisons to speak and do different performances to help spread the word.. “Our play, CONTROL.ASSAULT.DELETE, is a two person play (John & I), we play the roles of ourselves, Lisa and her abuser, the bailiff and judge. We don't hold anything back, Lisa's drug use, the fact that she slept with a drug dealer for Sam to get his drugs. But we don't want what we do to be a memorial to Lisa, it is about every Lisa, Julie, Mary and Joe.” The performances also include “DV the Musical?” and “I Have This Friend”. The performances are very strong and not easily forgotten, as explained by Linda. ”My little non profit is small, but we try to make a difference. Our productions are really good and we have never failed to have a standing ovation. The message is strong and it is not something that is forgotten soon.”
“Fix the Hurt” has performed for over 20,000 people worldwide and have raised $15,000+ for victim services. Their website http://www.helpfixthehurt.org/ has listed many sources of information on domestic violence, victims, family, who can be a victim of domestic violence and offers a place and people for victims of domestic violence to turn to.
Domestic violence effects many people in many ways, be it the victim themselves or their families. Linda King was a victim herself, in her first marriage that had lasted nine years. “My first husband was abusive emotionally, but I never knew what it was. We were married for 9 years. We married very young.” Linda offers words of encouragement to victims of domestic violence. “You are a good person and deserve to be treated with respect. I will be here to listen and have information for you when you are ready. I won't judge you and I will believe you. I won't push you, but I will help you.” She even offers advice for people trying to help a person who is in a domestic violence relationship. “If you talk about their abuser, they will defend him. You have to keep the focus on them and what their dreams are and how to achieve those dreams. Can they achieve what they want if they stay where they are?” Those are very strong words of encouragement and advice from a very courageous woman.
There is much hope and passion in what Linda does, and there are many people who need to be informed of “Fix the Hurt” and their cause. “Fix the Hurts” website, its five directors and its list of volunteers, all help make it possible to help spread the word of domestic violence, what the outcome can be, how to deal with domestic violence, and how to spot a person who may be a victim of domestic violence. The people of “Fix the Hurt” are all very passionate about spreading the word and finding a stop to domestic violence. They are the heart and souls of “Fix the Hurt” and they are the courage, support, and strength for the victims of domestic violence.
